You know those times when you’re feeling kinda STUCK?
I’m going to share with you a little technique called The Parking Lot that you can use to get UNSTUCK at those times.
The analogy is this… when you park your car in a parking lot somewhere, do you bring everything that’s in the car WITH YOU when you get out? Not bloody likely, right?!
Most of the things in your car are needed, at SOME point in your life, but carrying them around unnecessarily everywhere you go seems absurd doesn’t it? Imagine walking around with your jumper cables around your neck… holding a big jug of wiper fluid… while balancing your coat and gym bag over your snow brush… and shoving your empty food wrappers and gas receipts in all your pockets… ridiculous!
So then WHY do we do that with our MINDS?
When we’re stuck it’s usually because we’re carrying around a bunch of unnecessary “extras” that are slowing us down or stopping us from making decisions or moving forward. Like: worries, doubts, what-ifs, FEARS, and anxieties… and those kinds of feelings and emotions usually revolve around the opinions of OTHER people that MAY or MAY NOT ever even happen: “what will they think?”, “what if I mess up?”, “what if s/he doesn’t agree?” …and so on.
The solution? Put it in the Parking Lot!
You need to “park” all the stuff that is not FACT. The fears and worries, the what-if’s and doubts. When you clear all that stuff away you are left with a visible path from where you are to where you want to be.
Now keep in mind that not all fears are created equally. Some of them are like gentle “proceed with caution” alerts. Maybe we’ve been down that road before and we have a new wisdom from that fear experience. But caution is not the same as stopping cold and running screaming in the opposite direction! Don’t allow your fears to be excuses for avoidance or all-out action paralysis. Take a closer look at them.
Once you have “just the facts” laid out in front of you, reintroduce one fear at a time from the parking lot. Then ask yourself… is this REAL? Does this REALLY matter? If you’re worried about what Aunt Edna might think or say or judge, ask yourself this: In 5 days, 5 months, 5 years from now will I regret letting that ONE thing stop me from going froward? (And seriously, even if she does get judgey, won’t she likely be outta your hair and into someone else’s business before too long anyway?)
FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real… APPEARING REAL… not ACTUALLY real.
The problem with letting a mass of insecurities and worries hang around together is they become overwhelming. When you look at them one at a time they are significantly minimized and carry far less weight. Then, there will be less chance of getting off-track and wasting your valuable time in worry-analysis over in Worryland. Ew… not a favourite vacation spot for sure!
Isn’t life about happiness, joy, ease, love??? Isn’t that what really matters?
So then if what it is you’re stuck on could make you HAPPIER and more in love with LIFE, then park the distractions, GET CLEAR, and find the COURAGE and take the steps to do the thing, have the conversation, take the action, take the risk, whatever it is you KNOW you need to do to get you closer to that what you desire.
I believe in you.
Fearlessly live an extraordinary life!